It is the beginning of a new chapter, each day, full of new possibilities and promise. It is fresh and spread ahead untouched and waiting for the daily challenges, laughter, tears, successes and failures to create the memories and wisdom I will someday look back on like the rest.
Our lives have changed so completely over the last few years that it is like remembering a book I once read, about characters I enjoyed, cried and laughed with, dreamed I dreamed of, friends I still miss occasionally.
Time moves so quickly, even during the most painful trials. To feel everything that God has put out into the world and what it has to offer and teach us, to learn from it in a way that leads to growth and to see God’s wisdom in it and the lessons I need.
There is a need that is so real; it is as if I am formed of that need. I feel a positive need to make a real difference to others; to share what I have experienced and learned. To ease someone in some small sense of any of the worry, trials, pain or loneliness that I have felt and come out the other side of.
Oh, looking into our lives, others might shake their heads; feel some kind of sadness or pity for our circumstances. Looking over these last few years, loved ones might gasp and others may sneer in some misplaced satisfaction. But the truth what it really is? The truth is we are, and always have been so incredibly and amazingly blessed and protected that we are living with hope and joy, each and every day.
Every heart ache, every difficulty and disappointment – they all hurt, most even tempted me to simply curl up in a tight ball in a dark room and stay there. They were that horrible. Then, when the tears dry and breath comes easy and slow again, I can see clearly the moment I was in with a protected distance and examine the details, looking for the lesson I was needed to fully grasp so that I could be ready for whatever came next.
My weakness wants to fuss and worry, but I have learned too much over the years not to see and know how beautiful and blessed our lives are. To focus with the wisdom inside me leading, simple, overflowing joy makes the laughter burst out of me and lights my eyes with the smile that can’t stop.
So. I am building a new website. I have a fabulous job and career I couldn’t have even imagined only a few years ago and a home that is slowly taking the shape of our dreams again. I hope you will be part of this next step of the journey that is ahead.
Scriptures for Beginning Again